When Cognitive Dissonance Arrives in the Mail

Today I received the latest issue of the Catholic Sun and a tote bag for being an HRC Partner. Perhaps not a mutually exclusive pairing, but coming on the heels of the Supreme Court rulings on DOMA and California’s Prop 8, the two bits of mail made me wonder if I need more clarity in my life.

In the quiet of my front courtyard, I read the articles related to the rulings and admired my tote bag, and concluded I’ll side in favor of love in all arguments, this one included. What’s good in a marriage is a loving couple. What’s good for children are loving grown-ups and, by grown-ups, I mean people who lovingly take on care-taking responsibilities of children, so this could be older siblings, grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins, moms, dads, adoptive moms, adoptive dads. The sexual orientation of these grown-ups isn’t relevant to their care-taking.

So, my cognizance isn’t dissonant on this fact: Love matters most. Seems to me, the more loving couples there are, the more stable and contented children we’ll have and a huge purpose of marriage is to establish a framework for creating stable and contented children. Joint tax filing, visitation rights, inclusion on phone trees, being able to say “Let me ask my husband and I’ll get back to you”…also nice.

The Supreme Court weighed in, not to establish itself as an oligarchy, but because state and federal laws related to marriage were challenged with respect to constitutional protections. In cases like this, it’s the Supreme’s Court’s job to weigh in. I’m always pleased when government workers do their job, since they work for me (and all other American citizens). I can’t afford to hire slackards.

Always good a good day when the mail makes me think.

Always good a good day when the mail makes me think.

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An Uphill Climb

Some days it feels like every step forward is an upward one. Sure, I guess this could be tiring, but consider the view from the top. Last weekend I hiked up to 10,000 feet with my family, the highest my kids have gone with their feet still on the ground. Before getting out of cell phone range, I had down-loaded HRC’s photo ap for imprinting pictures with the red version of the logo. Using it along the trail, of course, colored my thoughts as well as my snapshots of the quaking aspens. How could it not occur to me that I was hiking with my family, a small gaggle of four individuals who, because of the gender differences between my husband and I, were recognized, legally, by the Nation as a family.

I imagined what it might feel like if this weren’t the case. . .Sure, I might be able to still enjoy a hike (on federal land by the way), but I wouldn’t feel like the constitution had my back.

I’ve been mad at the United States Supreme Court ever since they decided the Gore/Bush presidential election, but today, by striking down DOMA, I get to remember why I had admired the court in the first place. They ruled on the constitutionality of the Defense of Marriage Act. I’m happy, because I agree with the decision. I believe every loving couple in the United States should be able to enjoy the federal and state privileges my husband and I do. But I feel proud of the governmental process, because the Supreme Court did what they are called upon to do by the constitution. Decide of the constitutionality of laws.

And, in the time it’s taken me to write this post, the California case ruling has been announced. So, Yay for my home state!

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